Thank you whoever sent me the anonymous California flag shirt! My district leader tried to throw it at me and instead hit one of the assistants right in the face. It was good.
Wanna know some pretty exciting news that I've neglect to share with y'all for a long time?
We're getting a new mission president on Wednesday. You'd think I would have informed you about this sooner. I'm kind of really excited, but I'm like the only one. I was just hanging out in the passenger seat of our car and I felt the spirit tell me to get pumped for President Clark. I think he's going to be a lot more serious business than President Orgill, which is good. President Orgill is my favorite person though, so I don't know how to feel about that. Anyway President Clark will interview me within the next two weeks and we'll have zone conferences this week. I'll tell you what he's like next week probably.
He's probably going to tell us to ride bikes.
Speaking of riding bikes: There are 24 Elders coming in next transfer so they told all the Elders to be prepared to be fulltime bike. It's real awkward because the Elders coming in are fixin to start being younger than Matthew.
We had a couple cool experiences this week. We met a lady named Helen.
It was like 3049586734 degrees outside and we were so done being outdoors when we met her. It was awesome because as we were waking away she was reading the Book of Mormon. She told us part of her story. She said she was healed by a faith healer and her faith in Christ was so strong that she lost all her strength to move. I gave her Alma 36 to read. We went back to visit her and she told us that the Book of Mormon was different because it was more like making things that are taught in the Bible clear and explaining them more fully. We were like #true. We're hoping she'll come to church this weekend.
I've been dealing a lot lately with being afraid to do everything that used to be really easy for me. For example contacting. It's been the most frustrating thing ever. I was even afraid to give a training. Giving trainings is literally my favorite part of missionary work. I don't know what's going on. So anyway I was praying about it and I remembered that fear is the opposite of faith. So I decided to pray to know. When you pray to know Heavenly Father will give you a witness that the gospel is true. No matter how many times you do it. Also when you're clear and direct in your prayers Heavenly Father answers them quickly.
We decided that I'm going to be dishonorably released from my mission because I'm going to get a really obnoxious mullet right before zone conference. So there's nothing I can do except rock the mullet or shave my head, both of which are against the white handbook. So President Clark will have no choice but to send me home for being disobedient.
"We can ask Mary what to do. She'll probably tell us to get district mullets." -Me
The Elders made this really artistic cow out of a broken chair, ducktape, a stick, and some teddy bear eyes so they could practice roping it on pday. I'm actually impressed.
"Wherefore the course of the Lord and McDonald's chicken nuggets are one eternal round." -Me
"Please send the elect to Jack in the Box" -Me
"Do I look like I've been sweating all day?" -me
"Me too." -Sister Baker
"You can spot basher from like 50 yards away" -Elder Center
"sometimes I can't always tell." -Me
"You can always tell if someone's a basher by their car." -Elder White
"If their bumpersticker says Compass Bible you know they're gonna bash" -The whole district
"You also have really great superficial qualities like amazing eyebrows." -Sister Wimmer
"I felt like I was in an institute class and you were my funny but knowledgeable teacher" -Sister Wimmer
The Elders gave us a pitcher of watermelon it was hilarious.
Reading assignment is Alma 3. Look for when Mormon takes the opportunity to teach us gospel principles.