6/20/2016 Half of the shortest companionship in the mission.

To:  Charley Atchley

So I'm officially half of the shortest companionship in the ENTIRE MISSION. We're even shorter than the Chinese sisters. Sister Baker and I are an average of 5' 1". She also sits in the pews with her legs crossed, confirming my theory that I do that so my legs don't dangle.

Sister Baker and I are terrible companions. I'm pretty sure this companionship was NOT inspired and President Orgill did NOT know what he was doing when he arranged this. We just have way too much fun and party way too hard. I don't think I've stopped laughing since 4:00 on Tuesday. It's also really terrible because we're both just turning into Lumpy Space Princess. We're like the shortest sassiest companionship in the entire California Irvine Mission. We're going to make LSP shirts and wear them to every zone activity. I'm so happy because like my only redeeming quality is that I'm funny and Sister Peterson barely though I was funny. Sister Baker thinks I'm hilarious though. She's right.

Here's us. We are literally shorter than every other companionship. It's not even a joke. Elder Center is mad because his ward share is the shortest sassiest one. The other thing about Sister Baker is that she straight up is a gangster. So basically we're the same.

I don't have a lot to report this week. I guess I can talk about how different the areas are. Mission Viejo 2 is way more normal than Oak Creek. Like there are regular human beings here and white people. Also everyone here is form Saddleback Church which is considerably less aggressive than Mariners. We have met quite a few Compass Bible people though. Luckily they were too young to be really major bashers. In Mission Viejo nobody has air conditioners because it never really gets that hot. Except this week it's up in the 100s. I keep telling people it's not that bad because it's been up in the 100s since like May in Texas. I just get told that Texas is a dry heat. It's true. It's really humid here. Also I'm a big baby so when it's 80 I'm basically dead.

Another difference between Oak Creek and Misison Viejo is that not all our less actives are less active because they're anti so we can actually meet with them. It's like a whole different mission. We also have investigators. I met one of them the other day. She's pretty cool. She's a middle school teacher and her husband is a member. Their psycho jungle bird, Magu, tried to take my leg off and then laughed like a maniac. Actually what happened was I got scared because he was hopping around on the floor and suddenly he was attached to the hem of my skirt. So I jumped which scared him so he bit my leg and started freaking out and running in circles. Then we were all laughing so he started laughing too. It just sounded like a maniac because he's a bird and therefore doesn't have normal vocal cords.

OH! My ward mission leader has the coolest printer I've ever seen. It can make like 6x12 foot high quality canvas prints. He's a hobby photographer. He's really cool.

Also we have room mates. They're pretty cool too.

Funny Quotes:

"At least that way you're not always having to flip to the weekly goals to review them in the planner." -Sister Peterson

"yeah cause that's the MOST inconvenient part of missionary work." -me

"What flipping pages?" -Sister Peterson

"Yeah well I mean I think my weaknesses that prevent me from doing the work are the most inconvenient part of missionary work, but flipping through the planner is pretty bad too." -me

Somehow I made it all the way through our companionship until transfer day without being sassy to Sister Peterson and she didn't even know I was being sarcastic when I did.

#IBelieveInMiracles

"Sister Atchley I love how you're just not participating in anything" -Elder Killpack

Elder Killpack LOVED the planner cover I made him. He laughed for like 10 minutes then he took pictures of it and sent it to his entire family. I was honestly not expecting that reaction, but I was pretty flattered.

"You're going to serve your whole mission with Elder Center." -Sister Henderson

"Yeah Sister Atchley. What's Heavenly Father trying to tell you eh?" -President Henderson

"Yeah he shoes horses and goes to school at the same time." -Elder Center

Elder Center's brother is like the most amount of professionally certified to make horseshoes that it is possible to be.

"I only know how to find and teach everything else confuses me." -Me

"That's all you need Sister Atchley." -Elder Center

"Maybe someone's house is burning down so they'll be humble and in a preparation to hear the word." -Me

"Look this toilet is SO FULL................................... hey we're staring at a toilet." -Me

"They don't have any bread so let them eat cake." -Me

"bless and sanctify this cake." -Sister Baker

"Can't you see I'm in the middle of FLYING." -A guy we contacted (flying a remote control helicopter)

"I'm having a really good day today because this morning I started off the day by reading a really good talk by a guy named Brother Atchley." -Elder Center

"Sister Atchley knows all the scriptures. I wish she could just follow me around and share scriptures." -Elder Center

"I miss my 14 year old boys." -Sister Ward

"I probably relate most to Brigham Young"-Sister Shumway

"Is that because she has 50 husbands?"-me

"yeah" -Sister Wimmer

"Never have I ever shaved my face." -Me

"Uhhh.... yeah nope me either..." -Elder Anthony and Elder Keith

"So what you can learn from this analogy is that.... Non-members are cans." -Me

"Non members are cans!" -Sister Baker 

"So what we learn from this scripture is that if you're righteous you get fat." -me (Mosiah27:6-7)

"He will strengthen you to resist His influence in your life. Wait what?" -Me

"Broided hair!? Looks like I'm living in sin!" -Me

"Turns out you can't braid your hair and go to banquets or you're a sinner." -Me

"I'm never getting married." -me

"Shut up Sister Atchley! NO way!" -Elder Center

"Yeah You're gonna have like a million kids." -Sister Baker

"I can see it! Mama Atchley livin in some house out in some yard with a white picket fence keepin all them suckers in." -Elder Center

and finally the quote to summarize our entire companionship:

"What am I doing with my life?" -Sister Baker

"Me either!" -Me

The Reading Assignment:

2Peter chapter 3. Notice what he says about Paul in verses 15-16.

Love Y'all!

6/13/116 Elder Center part 2

Dear Dad

Well I'm getting transferred. Plot twist: I'm going to Mission Viejo. Plot twist: I'm ward sharing with Elder Center. Plot twist: I will have served 4/5 transfers in the same ward as him at the end of next transfer. Weird day. Get prepared for weekly goat jokes. I'm more excited that ever before. Also his companion is Elder Mueller. #mtcReunion Also everyone in Mission Viejo is everyone that was in Irvine two transfers ago. This is Sister Shober's last transfer. My mom is exceedingly old and about to go down to her grave. RIP Sister Shober. I'm actually really sad though because she's gonna go home and get married and have 50 kids and forget about me. ): We'll jump that hurdle when we get to it I guess.

I always say "way to heave that dead cat into somebody else's backyard" and people just look at me like I spoke a foreign language. I always think it when somebody asks a difficult question and my companion turns to me. "I'll just let the recent convert handle this one." Just kidding I actually know a lot about the gospel somehow. The spirit just teaches me all the time. I'll get out of the shower and write like two pages of revelation out of nowhere. It's amazing. I was being all sad the other day because there's this Elder named Elder Mills who knows just everything and I was thinking I would never know as much as Elder Mills. Then I realized I'm only on my second time through the book of Mormon. Sister Peterson was so done with me.

ANYWAY Wanna know some useful stuff?

Too bad I'm not a useful missionary. Jk

We went on exchanges this week it was actually amazing. I was so sure I was going with Sister Fullmer because we're besties and we just want to go on exchanges so bad. I forgot that that's not how Heavenly Father does stuff. So I prayed about what goal I should set for exchanges and received the answer of setting specific return appointments. I thought it was so weird because that's the kind of thing Sister Fullmer is all about. So I went with Sister Worthen instead and it turns out they set a window for that day. We went to the window and just absolutely killed it. By killed it I mean we listened to the spirit and discerned the needs of the people we were talking to and asked inspired questions. We also set four specific return appointments. It was so amazing. We worked together in unity so well even though we've never really even hung out before. Also she's from New Zealand and this was her first time driving on the right side of the road. We didn't even die. #miracles.

"Wait what lane do I turn into?" -Sister Worthen 50 times

*Turns on windshield wipers instead of blinker* -Sister Worthen 

It was a party. We also found a really solid investigator for Yale ward.

"So this book teaches about Jesus Crist." -Sister Worthen

"I will buy this book. How much?" -Kai

We were so excited. We sent the Chinese Elders to communicate with him more effectively.

I got sick and threw up for the first time since I was like 12, but I got a blessing and was totally better the next day. It was amazing. Curly fries look really gross when partially digested fyi. It was pretty bad. It was like throwing up about $10.00 worth of consecrated funds. Then I slept for 3 hours. Sorry Sister Peterson.

We said goodbye to a lot of people this week. By we I mean I. Sister Peterson isn't going anywhere. It was so sad. I served in Oak Creek for half a year. HALF of an entire YEAR. I'm like a part of the ward. I only have about a year left somehow so now for every major holiday you can be like "Next year Sister Atchley will be here." Except y'all probably call me by my first name huh? Weird. I'm gonna be that awkward returned missionary guy when I get home. "Hey sisters let me know if you need anyone to go out with you because I just got back from my mission and I'm available. WANNA HEAR ABOUT IT?? (please I have no friends or social skills)"

An actual really cool story is how much I've been able to have an effect on different members of the ward. Remember the Hydes that I sometimes write about? They recently adopted a baby. It was so cool because Sister Hyde shared that she was reading her journal from around February and she was readying about how hard it was for her to want to be a church at that time but she wrote that Sister Shober and I taught her and it changed her opinion. It was really cool because that's around the time that we were assigned to do temple tours and had to miss two hours of church every week. I remember going to the Hyde's house and being so sad and angry about it and just saying like "I can't believe that they aren't letting me go to all three hours of church. Going to all three hours of church is like the most important thing ever, it's the only thing that gets me through the week blah blah etc." That was pretty much my biggest trial my second transfer, but it was so cool that it was able to bless Sister Hyde with HER trials at that time. Sometimes Heavenly Father gives us trials so that we can strengthen those around us. Trials put us in a unique position to understand the importance of certain things. Then we are better able to testify of those things.

There's an Elder name Elder Kenner who was kind of a punk and hated the church when he was a kid. He says he came on his mission and learned for the first time what the church really is about and what the gospel really does for people and his testimony is SO STRONG. When he talks about the gospel and when he teaches you can tell he just loves it so much. Sister Peterson and I talk about also how strong it is when your testimony comes from faith. For example I know that Heavenly Father answers my prayers because when I ask for things they literally happen. I can see that one thing happens as a direct result of another. When I testify of prayer I know that what I'm saying is true. However, as of yet I'm not part of an eternal family. I'm not sealed to anyone. So when I testify of eternal families the only way I'm able to bear that testimony is that I trust Heavenly Father to make that happen for me. For me that testimony is purely faith based. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's something I think about a lot.

Funny Quotes Time:

"Elder Richards won't be sad when I get transferred. He'll be like yay no more sisters to make me uncomfortable!" -me

"uuuh! Every time Sister Atchley!!"- Elder Richards

"Elder Hales! Just be quiet!!" -Elder Richards

"HA! Not me this time!" -Me

"What are you doing?" -Sister Lee

"indexing" -Elder Hales

"What's that?" -Sister Lee

"Taking records of dead people and make them alive again."- Elder Hales

"IT'S A LOT LESS CREEPY THAN YOU JUST MADE IT SOUND." -Me and Elder Richards

"Black people?" -Me

"Sister Atchley! They're people too!" -Elder Richards

"I kept saying religious blackground instead of religious background while contacting the other day. It was way awkward." -me

"SISTER ATCHLEY!!!" -Elder Richards

I love Elder Richards because he's 50% appalled and 50% laughter every time he talks to me.

"This is my friend. I didn't just meet her I know her from church." -Elizabeth Zaffos

I got hit on by two different guys this week. One of them was a Caribbean guy. He said fat people are more attractive. Take that how you will.....

"In the Carribean we think curvy people are happier and have a better life. So more attractive." -guy

"You girls are modest I like that. The world needs more modest girls." -same guy

"How old am I? I stopped counting after 50" -the guy

"Well does your church believe in keepin healthy? No drugs and alcohol? No coffee? I believe that. That's what a church should believe." -Same dude

He was initially going to flirt with us but when we said we were talking about Jesus he was actually WAY more interested. Plot twist. He's actually really solid.

"Did you guys vote?" -Sister Degener

"I don't want to vote I'm uninformed." -Me

"But Sister Atchley, an uninformed voter is the most American voter." -Elder Mills

"Oh right I'll just vote for whoever has the most signs." -me

"The American way." -Elder Mills

"These tiny squash are USELESS" -Sister Worthen

"What are you trying to say!?" -Me

"are you a tiny squash?" -Sister Worthen

"I'm just a little offended that you're implying that something's worth is based on how large it is." -me

"Well you see Sister Atchley, Onix, one of the largest pokemon, is MUCH stronger than weedle which is one of the smallest pokemon. Coincidence? I think not." -Elder Mills

"It was a really great exchange. We developed the attribute of longsuffering picking squash which are by nature very prickly." -Elder Mills

"Dog pile on Elder Davis!"- Elder Brown

"That's not appropriate." -me

"Oh yeah I forgot who y'all were.... sisters...." -Elder Brown

"I've got a rumbling in my tummy." -Elder Chan

"Same!" -me

"Maybe different. Mine's called lactose intolerance. It's like a tornado in there." -Elder Chan

"Thanks for that." -Elder Mills

"The reason you think you're being loud is that your ear drums are much closer to your vocal cords than ours are... because your head is so small." -Elder Brown

No reading assignment but a challenge instead. Pray only for other people this week. I'm doing it and it's actually amazing. Also it's made me realize a lot about how much I ask Heavenly Father for.

Love Y'all!

These are the Tenneys. They're the best. Sister Tenney is my mom. I will have so many moms when I got home I won't even know how to handle it.

"Everyone be short like Sister Atchley" -Sister Tenney

This is my favorite kid, Elizabeth Zaffos.

"You know who my favorite sister missionary is?" -Elizabeth

"Who?"-me

"Sister Atchley" -Elizabeth

This is her sister JayJay.

accurate

less accurate
Sometimes I can't handle the church sometimes.....

These are the Mannings, they're the best too. The were one of the first families I met on my mission. Like the second day or something.

Elder Killpack finds the answers to life in a glass of lemonade.

Turns out you've been going to church in the wrong building the entire time.

Who knew?

Get this book you will like it. ​

I made this planner cover for Elder Killpack and he actually doesn't hate me. Actually he laughed for like 10 minutes and I think I'm his favorite person now.

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"Sister Atchley how dare you leave our ward!" -Jake Henderson (not pictured) The Hendersons are the funniest family.

Sister Mitchell is awesome she plays the piano like nobody's business

These are the Turners. Brother Turner is really sassy. Sister Turner is really good at family history.

These are the Hydes! Cutest Family! Number One!

This is my district the first two weeks of the transfer.

Elder Mills, Elder Killpack, Hermana Green, Sister Fullmer, Sister Peterson, Elder Te'o, and Elder Kenner

​And my other district. (Personality accurate)

Elder Brown, Elder Davis, Sister Worthen, Sister Suchanski (try to pronounce her name you can't. It's like suh han skee) Sister Peterson.

6/6/2016

Instead of writing June 1 2016 in my journal I wrote May 32 so that's kind of like an allegory for my week/life. In related news: I can't believe it's already June! I only have a year left? What is this? I've been in Oak Creek for 6 months? Yeah I'm probably getting transferred. Which is a bummer because everything is changing in Oak Creek. We got a new bishop and now Brother Stokes is our ward mission leader. He's intense already. He harasses us every day about how we're doing. It's so nice. Sister Peterson is lucky. Brother Silva got put over Teaching in the Savior's Way. Have you looked at that manual? It's SO GOOD! It's like Preach My Gospel but not specifically for missionaries! you could probably apply it to your classroom. And by probably I mean read the manual before you start school next year. It's so good!

So anyway, this is week six and I'm trying not to freak out. I've never been transferred before.

So I forgot to write about this hilarious thing that happened to us last week.

We went to contact this less active lady that nobody has ever laid eyes on before. Unfortunately we met her husband instead. He spent like 10 minutes cussing us out and telling us all about how they had told everyone ever not to come back or they would sic the dogs etc. etc. I started off by saying that missionaries just get moved around and we don't know anything. Then I just smiled super big at him the entire time. So it was hilarious because he would alternate between saying the rudest stuff I've ever heard and apologizing profusely because he didn't want to offend us personally. It was so interesting to me because he quickly lost ill will towards us but maintained it towards the church. It just reminded me of how people view members of the church and "the church" as two separate things. Don't people know that any organization is made up of many individuals? Just something I think about all the time.

Luke 6:

 22 Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man’s sake.

 23 Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in heaven: for in the like manner did their fathers unto the prophets.

This week was kind of weird because we worked SO HARD last week and this week. We talked to over 200 people in the past two weeks. Except all week I wasn't recognizing the spirit. So I was praying and searching and trying to feel the spirit and trying to figure out what was wrong. I kept thinking "If I do everything right and go out and work as hard as I can I'll get it back."

So that's what I did, but instead I just got really stressed out. So we made it to weekly planning and got to comp inventory and I freaked out and cried a lot and was emo for like two hours. I was explaining everything I was feeling to Sister Peterson and it was hard because she was basically like "well I can't help you because welcome to every day of my life." So I talked to Sister Fullmer and she straightened me out.

The funny thing is I was being lead by the spirit and feeling it super strongly THE ENTIRE TIME. There was a point where I was praying and having all these thoughts about how much Heavenly Father loves me and how he hasn't abandoned me etc. I was like "Oh this is the spirit saying all these things to me." yet I didn't feel joy. It was like I started struggling and the automatic thing that happened was that Heavenly Father reassured me that he was still there and that I wasn't doing anything wrong.

I was crying and I just opened my scriptures to Mosiah 27:

36 And thus they were instruments in the hands of God in bringing many to the knowledge of the truth, yea, to the knowledge of their Redeemer.

 37 And how blessed are they! For they did publish peace; they did publish good tidings of good; and they did declare unto the people that the Lord reigneth.

and the spirit just told me for like 10 minutes continually that I was doing just fine.

Sunday was amazing. I received so much revelation and felt the love of my savior. I prayed to learn something new about the sacrament and our Sunday school lesson was on the sacrament. The teacher said that lesson "stood out to him" that morning. I learned a lot it was amazing. Then there was the temple music night devotional and I saw SO MANY PEOPLE THAT I CARE ABOUT! It was amazing! Sister Shober and Elder Dayton KILLED it. They are such good singers. Sister Shober is my best friend forever.

Funny Quotes:

"EW DON'T TOUCH HER KNEES"- Said no one ever (me)

"They were in the foyer." -Sister Henderson

"Oh I don't know I didn't pass to that foyer." -Said no one ever (Ryan Henderson)

"Oh she's on the floor. Oh no she looks drunk. Oh no take a picture." -Sister Fullmer

(Sorry for dat knee tho)

"Elder Te'o are you secretly a big geek?" -me

"IT'S NOT A SECRET" -Elder Mills

"Unless he's obese or unworthy he should just go on a mission." -Elder Mills

"That's what I said." -Me

"You used the word obese? That stings Sister Atchley." -Elder Mills

President Orgill said I'm a "good one" This isn't funny this is actually a major accomplishment.

"I brought snacks so if my training is bad you will still like it." -Sister Worthen

"Put it in the wheat thins box, that's our trashcan." -Sister Fullmer

"He's FROM the ghetto not OF the ghetto" - Elder Mills

"The assistants can help me! Wait why do I think they're gonna know how to spell? Actually I bet Elder Everett is lowkey a spelling be champ or something." -Me

"What the heck why?" -Sister Peterson

"Hey Elders! I need help! Can you spell circumstances?" -Me

"Uh it's C-I-R-C-U-M-S-T-A... N-C-E-S..." -Elder Everett

#CalledIt

"If I eat these unblessed french-fries will I go to hell?" -me

"probably." -Sister Peterson

"Rad." -me

"I ate one. That's probably why I have the hiccups. Then again you've had like 5 and nothing has happened." -Sister Peterson

"Well I'm probably just more righteous so it takes more for it to have an effect." -Me

"HEY!! You're probably right actually." -Sister Peterson

"Have I even had hiccups since you've been here?" -Me

"WHAT!?" -Sister Peterson

"Uh... Hiccups?" -Me

"OH I thought you said HOOKups." -Sister Peterson

(She didn't say no immediately which means she had to think about it...........)

"A farm boy..." -Sister Worthen

"I raised goats." -Elder Killpack

"Oh so you and Elder Center are good friends then?" -Me

"Hey Sisters does your phone not work or do YOU not work?" -Brother Turner

(Our dinner rescheduled on the one day we left our phone at home)

"Pretend like you're dead." -Elder Brown

"Good morning Elder Richards!" -Everyone

"Y'all are terrible at being dead." -Elder Brown

"Basically this isn't normal for me because I'm usually so aware that I'm feeling the spirit and right now I'm not. I've been working so hard though and trying to do everything right so I don't know what would have happened. It's not like I downed a six-pack or kissed a boy or anything so I don't know why anything would be different." -me

"Well Sister Atchley I think what you're experiencing is something called normal for the rest of us." -Sister Fullmer

"New testament makes no sense unless you read it with the spirit." -Elder Davis

"What it makes so much sense! He's talking about -this-" -Me

"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE SPIRIT!" -Elder Davis

"Sister Peterson has six boyfriends, one for each day of the week." -Elder Davis

"Except Sunday, that's the Lord's day." -Me

"You took the thoughts out of my mind." -Elder Davis

"Could we be companions?" -Sister Hobbs

"Nobody would take us seriously." -Me

"Not a single person!" -Sister Hobbs

"A prophet would be the best super hero because he can just do everything by his faith." -Elder Davis

"A prophet would be a terrible super hero! Those guys get killed ALL THE TIME!" -Me

Your reading assignment is Mosiah 4. Pay close attention to what King Benjamin is trying to tell us in the last two verses.

Also Mosiah 5:1 "So anyway does that make sense?" after like 3 chapters of intense throw down.

LOVE Y'ALL!!

I MADE PLANER COVERS

#StoryOfMyLife
I'm pretty sure President Clark will bring iPads and paper will become obsolete.
This one's for Sister Fullmer

OTHER PICTURES

This is a mission vehicle.

KIA makes me a little uncomfortable.

​If you know what I mean...

This is not a tree. It's an internet tower. #IrvineCalifornia

It's the safest city in the united states because dangerous people can't afford to live here.

​I've got all these wrinkles from smiling at the haters so much so now I don't look 14 anymore. Or maybe it's just the name tag

"Hello Sir! You seem a little short of breath. May I introduce the Lord's law of health?"

Ok but..... Who enforces this?